2020 this isnβt what we discussed!
Did you start the year with big visions, may be even set some time aside and did a vision board, kicked off ‘guns a-blazing’ to achieve all your goals for your ‘best year yet’ and then ‘unprecedented times’ struck?
It can be terribly disheartening when a spanner gets thrown into your grand plans forcing you to change direction and implement plans b, c, d through to z. *cue tissues and wine
So, how can you pivot and still achieve your goals? Let’s look at a few things.
What is your current reality?
It’s easy to get caught up in the ‘emotional wave’ of disappointment, frustration, failure, sorrow and even depression, but when we take a step back and look at what ‘really’ has changed sometimes the reality and the story we tell ourselves is somewhat different.
Let’s take the example of a conversation I recently had with a client. She had some goals set for the year and was on track to achieve them. COVID knocked on the door unannounced. She then turned her focus to:
· fear of the unknown,
· potential job loss,
· sadness for others losing their jobs,
· overwhelmed,
· frustrated,
· annoyed at the whole situation, and
· feeling a sense of loneliness and abandonment.
When we looked at what was currently ‘real’ in her world right now we discovered:
· everything is unknown in life (there’s no guarantees about anything from minute to minute)
· she is still (physically) going to work every day and employed with all the same conditions as pre-COVID,
· she has financial stability,
· her relationship status is the same as pre-COVID.
*note: being a single independent woman is not failure, or that you are not worthy or sexy or good enough xx
When we looked at these elements, and validated the emotions she was feeling, we noticed that much of this was a story she had taken on from the media, other people’s stories and that she hadn’t prioritised her own self-care in the last few weeks.
With a few realignments of thoughts, actions and focus she’s now focusing on being present, taking care of her mind, body and soul and rocking on.
What can you control?
When unexpected change happens it is easy to say ‘everything’ is out of your control. As humans we like to compound things by using words that are not truly reflective of situations, a bit of a victim mindset if you will. If you take a moment to reflect though, there is so much that is still ‘controllable’.
For example:
· The time you go to bed
· The time you wake up
· The foods you eat
· The attitude you bring to the day
· The people you connect with
· How much money you choose to save
· How much exercise you choose to do
· What you invest your time in (eg Netflix, learning, staring at the stars)
All of these things help move you towards or away from achieving your re-vamped goals. Make wise choices.
What needs tweaking?
When a curveball lands in your court it is easy to throw everything out the window, stomp your feet and give up. Before you do all that though, maybe there is an opportunity to tweak things slightly and still get close to, or even achieve, your goals.
Let’s say you were working with a trainer in a gym to be able to climb a volcano on that overseas wellness retreat that has also been cancelled! Can you tweak slightly and work with them online to still get the programming and support you need so you can train at home or in the local park? Sure, the retreat is on hold but as soon as it’s scheduled again you will be READY to climb that volcano (so the extra time is really a bonus, right).
What does your new success goal look like, now?
What defines ‘success’ may have been clear to you when you set your goals, so take some time to re-define what success looks like now in your current environment.
Maybe success was being able to do 100kg deadlift by May 2020. So your new success marker might look like: maintaining strength, muscle suppleness and injury free until you can get back in the gym and train with heavy weights again.
Perhaps you were on track to finish your certification of a course by September 2020, but with homeschooling your family and working your new success goal is doing 30 minutes of study a week.
What success looks like to you, is what success looks like to YOU (there’s no right or wrong answer).
Remember: for much of 2020s goals it isn’t YOU that has failed. The circumstances and environment in which you had aimed to achieve your goals has changed and that is OUT OF YOUR CONTROL. So focus on what is in your control, tweak, pivot, shimmy, smile and keep rocking forward.
Need some help? Coaching is a great way to explore your habits, embed them into your daily of life and achieve success in many areas. I would love to work with you on this so head to the contact page and drop me a message to discuss my coaching program options.
